Navigating Feelings: Third, Fourth & Fifth Grade

Loss takes many forms at different stages of our lives…

No matter the source, it almost always provokes strong feelings. When COVID-19 sent us all into lockdown, school kids all over the world experienced the loss of bantering with friends before school, connecting during recess, chatting with buddies over lunch, and laughing on the way home.

It felt like we were all out of our rhythm, right? Our predictable routines vanished and being outside of our “comfort zone” felt all too real.

Ask your child, “Can you see some signs that you’ve grown to adapt to the new normal? Maybe not love it, but you’ve adapted?”

Think about that… It’s a huge life skill to have the flexibility to adapt to new routines, especially when they are thrust upon us. Tell your child, “Give yourself credit for that flexibility. It will serve you well!”

Below you’ll find books and activities that are appropriate for 3rd, 4th and 5th Graders around the concept of “Navigating Feelings.”

GREAT BOOKS & CONVOS

Echo Mountain

Lauren Wolk

Why We LOVE This Book

Something about this book feels classic. It tugs at your heart like Charlotte’s Web (E.B. White) has you cheering for the determined heroine as in Island of the Blue Dolphin (Scott O’Dell), and the natural setting brings to mind My Side of the Mountain (Craighead George). Young Ellie and her family are living in a small house on the mountain during the Depression when her dad has an accident, and Ellie subsequently has a secret to keep. Her curiosity, loyalty, and resilience kept me reading past my bedtime, to figure out the fate of her and the whole family. It’s an exceptionally well-written book with a character who will live in your head and heart for a long time.

Conversation Launchers

The first sentence in this story is, “The first person I saved was a dog.”

As you read the rest of the book, stop and talk about who else she saved.

Talk about Ellie’s relationship with her mom.

What do you think about the Mom? Why do you think that?

What do you think the author wants us to learn from this book? Why do you think that?
Do you have a favorite quote from Ellie in this story? Why is that your favorite?
Was there a part of this story that made you uncomfortable or sad? Why?
What do you think would happen with Ellie and her family if the story continued (Echo Mountain Part 2)?

Interactive Activities

Keep the Conversation Going!

Make A Magic Recipe Think about the things that Ellie put in her jar (tears, sap, etc.). If you wanted to create a magical potion to save someone, what would you put in your jar? Write a recipe with your family and include why each ingredient is important.
Brainstorm Keeping-Busy Activities Do you think that Ellie kept herself busy so she could stay hopeful for the future? Talk about some of the adventures that Ellie had and the things she made and nurtured, that kept her busy. Now work with your family to make a list of things you could do to keep yourself busy when you need to stay hopeful. Post it somewhere so you can see and use the list for ideas when you’re having a bad day.
Learn About the Land Ellie says, “A mountain didn’t seem like something that could be owned.” Do you agree? Is there any area of land or natural resource around your community that people seem to disagree about? Do a little research with your family and talk about the issue together.
List Your YETs Ellie says she’s going to hold on to the word, “yet.” Why? Make a list with your family about your hopes and dreams, using the word “yet.” (I haven’t grown a rose garden YET. I haven’t learned to play a Taylor Swift song on the piano YET.)

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Louisiana’s Way Home

Kate DiCamillo

Why We LOVE This Book

Young Louisiana Elefante has been whisked away in the middle of the night by Granny. As they journey on the long and mysterious car ride, Louisiana reveals herself to be observant, resourceful, and resilient. Her voice is the star of the show, with lines like, “This is a nice hotel. I admire your vending machines and your alligator…” and “Granny had always spoken poorly of bologna, but these bologna sandwiches tasted so good that it was just one more reason for me to doubt Granny and the truth of her utterances.” As you watch Louisiana struggle with change, loss, and hope you find yourself rooting for a happy ending for this remarkable character.

Conversation Launchers

After each chapter, talk about something fortunate in Louisiana’s life, and something unfortunate.

Who or what is on her side?
What are the obstacles she faces?

At the end of the story, discuss…

How did Louisiana’s feelings change as this story moved along? Why did they change? Were there ways that Louisiana did NOT change too?
Talk about Granny at the end of the story. How do you feel about her? Why?
How do you picture Louisiana’s future? What do you think her life might look like going forward? What makes you think that?
Who do you think are the heroes or villains of this story? Why?
Was Louisiana cursed?

Interactive Activities

Keep the Conversation Going!

Make Notes of Quotes Louisiana has some memorable lines in this story. Some make you stop and pause, some make you laugh out loud. Write down one of Louisiana’s quotes on a sticky note after each chapter. When you are done reading, go back and read the sticky notes. What did those quotes reveal about her character and her feelings?
Draw Some Doors “Open doors…” said Betty Allen, “That is what we want – doors that are open to us.” What doors are open for Louisiana at the end of the story? Draw a picture of an open door for each member of your family. What doors are open for each of you at this moment in time? Write it inside the door. What doors do you wish were open?
Sketch It Out Louisiana begins to cry when Grandfather Burke pushes his ice cream to her and says, “That’s for you doodlebug.” Do a “quick draw” with every member of the family. Everyone should spend 5 minutes sketching a time when you were so overwhelmed with happiness, you wanted to (or did) cry. Share the sketches and talk about what made you so deeply touched at that moment.
Take A Chance Near the end Louisiana says, “I wanted to throw my tiny hat into the ring. I wanted to take my chances.” Besides the cake raffle, how else does Louisiana take a chance in this story? Talk about this concept with your family. How might each family member take a chance for their future happiness? What would they do?

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Ms. Bixby’s Last Day

John David Anderson

Why We LOVE This Book

This novel is about a trio of buddies in middle school who spend most of their time joking around, inventing games, and generally being kids. Then their beloved teacher is suddenly gone, seeking cancer treatment, and their new mission is to figure out a way to let her know how much she’s missed.

Conversation Launchers

Talk about each character and how they reacted differently to the announcement about Ms. Bixby’s illness.

Why did they each react as they did?

An important “Bixbyism” that the boys remember from their teacher is, “Nothing worth it is ever easy.”

Do you agree?
Can you think of an example from your own life where that was true?
Can you think of another “ism” (or “phrase to live by”) that you believe? That your family members believe?

Talk about “The Plan” that the boys developed.

Why did they feel a need to develop a plan? Was it effective?
How did they handle obstacles?

What event or events do think earned Ms. Bixby the designation as “One of the Good Ones?”

Do you have a teacher in your life who would be named “One of the Good Ones?” Why?

Interactive Activities

Keep the Conversation Going!

The boys wanted so much to help their teacher through a rough time.

Create A List for Crisis-Relief Brainstorm with your family about things you can do to help someone in crisis (health, grief, financial, etc.). Place it somewhere where you can add to it over time. When someone you know is in crisis, choose something on the list and do it with your family.
Make A List of “isms” Pull together that your family considers “phrases to live by.” We created a list of “Wallyisms” when my husband died. We have added to it over the last year and it is an important and loving reminder of his own brand of wit and wisdom.
Write A Gratitude Letter Dedicate it to teacher in your life who you’d call “One of the Good Ones” and send it via email or regular mail. Guaranteed: you will make their day!
Dedicate & Decorate A Drawer Create your own version of “Ms. Bixby’s bottom drawer” for your family. She kept things in that drawer that reminded her of hopes and dreams (hers and her students). You could use a real drawer or the Drawer of Dreams graphic (below) to make a family drawer for this year. Fill it with images or words that represent a current dream for each member of your family. Revisit the drawer every year (maybe on New Years day or birthdays) and add more images so you can see how your dreams have changed (or not) over time!

TRY IT OUT!

OUR EXAMPLE:

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Resources for OTHER AGE GROUPS

SEARCH BY GRADE LEVEL…

Navigating Feelings: Pre-K & Kindergarten

Navigating Feelings: First & Second Grade